Marines: solving every problem with either a knife hand or C4.
"I almost got my MBA. Totally wanted to. But my dad wanted me to kill the enemies of America.”
“We’re working hard to make the SIPR sites you need the most confusing piles of shit imaginable," an official said.
Donation will “tide everyone over” until someone finds seven billion more cans
Battalion leadership confident spreadsheet power will deter China.
Congress assures troops that poverty builds character.
Hundreds of generals trapped at Quantico after DTS crash forced to role-play their way out.
Generals relieved it wasn’t a firing squad or Eyes Wide Shut reenactment
General returns to find ICE in museums, POWs in Ukraine, and the Constitution on vacation.
DHS Secretary insists dog was ‘out of regs and possibly liberal.’
The retired officer says that America is woefully under-resourced in a defense technology capability that is only sold by his company.
"I saw it all. All of Pornhub at once. I was, like, the god of porn for a minute.”
"There’s no ‘I’ in team" but there are three 'U's in "shut the f--k up"
Anonymous clergy sources confirmed that Francis had reviewed Vance’s background and uttered the words “Not today, Satan."
“I guess I thought there was more humanity to unravel with J.D.”
Corners remain to be turned, contracts to be awarded
"Look me in the eye and tell me God does not 100% revile the infantry."
“I am making Havoc healthy again,” says Kennedy.
“You can’t fire me if you can’t find me,” read a note at the bottom of a coffee mug at Marine Corps Base Camp Lejeune.
"I have no idea why my former Congressman was here in a red convertible Mercedes."
"Our nation expects only the best from SOF, including their transition to the crazed veteran life."
Uncommon valor with common storage.
“These are not the buttholes that defeated the Nazis."
When asked for comment, a spokesperson from the Marine Corps simply stated, “Yut.”
As recruit H. Potter was called forward, he was heard muttering, “Not Marines, not Marines."
Shipping & taxes calculated at checkout.
