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Actual issue preview

This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.

Story Roundup

Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.

Situation Report

A State Department map that relocated most of Africa, one ambitious government travel card, and 5,200 medical students moved from dorms that definitely do not have mold.

Platoon idiot charged with larceny in oxygen theft

CAMP PENDLETON, Calif. — The platoon idiot for India Co., 2nd Platoon, 3rd Bn, 4th Marines has been arrested and charged with grand larceny after he was allegedly found to be stealing oxygen from government property, sources confirmed Tuesday.

“This is the most serious case of thievery we’ve ever encountered,” said Col. David Sawyer, a spokesman for the base.

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