CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Former Army sergeant and professional aggrieved veteran Robert Haskell's passion for criticizing political correctness in academia is surpassed only by his own hypersensitive victimhood narrative about all things veteran-related, sources confirmed today.

"I saw a video on Facebook where these Oberlin students burned an American flag," a tearful Haskell said during a recent interview with Duffel Blog. "They basically committed an act of violence against everyone who has ever served. It's an emotional IED. I literally couldn't bring myself to use social media for days."

"I've had it with their hysterical moralizing," Haskell claimed. "74% of veterans end up homeless and there are 94 veteran suicides per minute so, no, I don't have time for made-up statistics from special snowflakes," he claimed, using a derogatory term for activists whose hypersensitivity and obsession with oppression causes them to behave like insufferable parodies of the very groups they claim to advocate for.