Army plans 'dad bod' physical standards for males with dependents
FORT BRAGG, N.C. — The Army is running a pilot program testing modified physical fitness and body composition standards for men of any age with dependents. “In past decades we’
FORT BRAGG, N.C. — The Army is running a pilot program testing modified physical fitness and body composition standards for men of any age with dependents. “In past decades we’
WASHINGTON — Claiming he is “sick of this goddam presbyopia” and asserting “it’s finally time to do something about it,” Army Chief of Staff Raymond Odierno today ordered everyone in
Pro-American clothing company Hard 4 America LLC has launched a new line of patriotic caskets for active and former troops, Duffel Blog has learned. “Based on overwhelming demand for more
The following is an opinion piece by Boatswain’s Mate 1st Class Sam Ojeda, USS Carl Vinson (CVN-70) Deck Department It’s no secret that human sex trafficking is a
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The State Department announced it is unable to make better recruiting videos than a group who turns their new recruits into suicide bombers.
BAGHDAD — The Pentagon came under sharp criticism from veterans today, after ISIS released a propaganda video following the seizure of Ramadi that showed its fighters entering the dining facility wearing
TIKRIT, Iraq — The Islamic State is rethinking its mobile carrier today, after sending a message to America that wound up costing it $73 million in overage charges on its wireless
UNDISCLOSED LOCATION, Texas- A soldier participating in Jade Helm is disappointed to learn the military is not actually imposing martial law and taking over Texas, sources confirmed. Sergeant 1st Class
The following is an opinion written by A Veteran. HIGH HORSE, W.Va. — Oh hey, what's up America? I couldn't help but be a little nosy
FORT LEWIS, Wash. — The Army’s Inspector General is continuing to search for evidence surrounding allegations that the Second Battalion, Third Infantry Regiment, also known as the Patriots, was fighting
PALO ALTO, Calif. — The algorithm that powers the Facebook social network is absolutely convinced that you would like to add your sergeant major and numerous staff officers to your friends
NORFOLK, Va. — The deck department of USS San Antonio listened to Boatswain’s Mate 1st Class Raymond Bernard give another 45 minute speech about how they shouldn’t waste time
JOINT-BASE LEWIS-MCCHORD, Wash. — Capt. Miles Donahue, commander of Headquarters and Headquarters Company (HHC) in the Headquarters and Headquarters Battalion (HHB) of US Army I Corps, finally realized that he doesn’
FORT HOOD, Texas — Thousands of people commemorated the 19th Century forced march of Native Americans today with a brisk jog at the Second Annual "Trail of Tears Memorial 5K.
Are You There, Vodka? It’s Me, Public Affairs. I wasn’t expecting to meet so early this morning, but some poor woman in Europe is complaining she’s been
The following is an op-ed written by your commanding officer. What are you doing in my office, private? I seriously said I had an open door policy? Sure, my door
Ten-hut! This story won't just tug at your heartstrings, it'll have them doing pushups, too! Pretty much everybody today will tell you they "support the
JOINT BASE ELMENDORF-RICHARDSON, Alaska — Staff Sgt. David Cornell is taking full advantage of a new congressional bill which passed last week, officially ending the military’s ban on nudists serving
PORT HUENEME, Calif. – Seabee Brian Dennis, 26, assigned to Naval Mobile Construction Battalion 25, has shown that he is capable of fixing everything except his relationship. “I thought things were
FORT DRUM, N.Y. — Senior leaders at the Pentagon have shelved a controversial new policy mandating 100% black light inspections during Central Issue Facility (CIF) turn-in. Public documents indicate that
WASHINGTON — Responding to criticisms over a pending US-Iran Nuclear deal, President Obama has offered an alternate plan offering late-model nuclear weapons to Iran. “They really think that they want nuclear
FORT HOOD, Texas —First Lieutenant Kevin Kotowski is excitedly anticipating his upcoming year-long deployment to Afghanistan in support of Operation Freedom Sentinel, friends say. In particular, the sources add, Kotowski
EXETER, R.I. — In yet another case of oppressing Americans' love of country, Exeter West Greenwich Regional high school junior Brad Reynolds was admonished by administrators earlier this week
RAQQA, Syria — The Islamic State joined world leaders and veterans organizations Saturday in numerous ceremonies throughout the caliphate honoring WWII veterans through mass genocide and unchecked, forcible expansion into neighboring
WASHINGTON — Recognizing the need for a new strategy to fight ISIS, the Pentagon announced today that it would no longer supply the Iraqi Army with American vehicles, artillery and rifles,
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