Hundreds dead after Air Force dining facility runs out of truffles, wagyu beef

Please God, let there still be Pâté.

JOINT BASE SAN ANTONIO, Texas – Hundreds of airmen starved to death after the base dining facilities ran out of gourmet foodstuffs, including truffles and wagyu beef, sources confirmed today.

“Last month we had to close down the sushi bar and now this,” Lt. Gen. Marshall B. Webb, commander of the Air Education and Training Command said during a press con…