THE PENTAGON — After organizing the Space Force’s moon-themed 3rd birthday party, an exhausted and disheveled Air Force expressed optimism that the worst of Space Force’s behavior was now in the past.

“I’ll admit, raising a new branch has been harder than expected,” said Air Force. “He’ll never eat the budget I give him, and he is always on his screens instead of playing with the other branches.”

One of the Air Force’s more difficult moments occurred when Take Your Child to Work day coincided with a Joint Chiefs of Staff meeting. According to inside sources, Air Force refused to let Space Force wear his Star Trek costume to the meeting but relented after the toddler screamed outside the Chairman’s office. Since then, Space Force has rarely been seen in public without it, eliciting questions about Air Force’s ability to successfully control the new branch.