This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.
Story Roundup
Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.
Situation Report
Coast Guard boat crashing through waves is having a f*cking blast!
CAPE DISAPPOINTMENT — Witnesses in the southwestern corner of Washington state have reported that a 47-foot Coast Guard vessel was last seen having the time of its fucking life crashing through gigantic 18-foot breakers past the Columbia River bar.
The Coast Guard boat, known for its durability in treacherous weather, was heard yelling things like “WEEEEEEEEE!!!” and “Guys guys guys guys guys, waaaatch this, BWOOOOSHHHH!!” After being knocked around and blasting through the waves like a killer whale, the boat emerged from the water unscathed and ready for another one.
At one point, a pedestrian asked, as the boat disappeared into the swell, “Where is it? What if it sank?” Locals claim that there was a moment there where everyone held their breath and was not sure if the Coast Guard was going to appear again.
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Hegseth declares blow jobs not gay if both men are fit, clean-shaven
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Staff command works hard to accomplish nothing
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Duffel Labs
A field desk of military mischief and useful bad ideas
Pentagon Buzzword Generator
Generate authentic defense jargon.
Pocket NCO
Leadership advice with a knife hand.
Navy SEAL Book Generator
One click. Instant airport bestseller.
DD-214 Fortune Teller
Your civilian future, declassified.
Military Speech Builder
Remarks for ceremonies and mandatory fun.
Veteran Benefits
Your service. Four ridiculous entitlements.
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