Skip to content
DUFFEL BLOG

Free military brief. No CAC required.

For more than a decade, we've deployed pitch perfect satire to service members around the world.

Join thousands of troops, veterans, and defense insiders who read Duffel Blog before breakfast.

“A must-read for national security nerds.”

—The Daily Beast
Subscribe form

Free. No spam. Unsubscribe anytime.

14years publishing
4,200+dispatches filed
20,000+readers briefed
Intel

CIA reveals Santa was killed in cambodian airspace in 1971

Recently declassified documents detail the top secret operation

CIA reveals Santa was killed in cambodian airspace in 1971

WASHINGTON — In news sure to shock millions this holiday season, recently declassified CIA documents have revealed that Santa Claus was shot down and killed in Cambodian airspace in 1971.

The trove of over 700 pages documenting the top secret mission has shed new light on the dangers involved in spreading Christmas cheer to active war zones.

“It was supposed to be a typical airdrop. Toys, cigarettes, ammo, the usual. But our intel was bad and things went downhill quick,” reads an interview that was conducted with a crew elf in Santa’s unit after the mission. “We didn’t know the [North Vietnamese Army] had anti-aircraft weapons. Colonel Claus came in fast and low for a candy cane run, and the bastards blew him out of the sky.”

More Stories

Your Cart

Your cart is empty

Browse the shop to find something you like.

Continue Shopping →
Subtotal

Add more for free shipping.

✓ You qualify for free shipping!