Tasteful. Understated. Also, fuck your feelings.

AUGUSTA, Ga. - Edgy patriotic and veteran-themed t-shirt producer Nine Line Apparel announced today that the company is entering the home furnishing market with a line of “veteran-inspired, bro-tastic, outrageously patriotic” couches, throws, and other home decor, according to a press release.

Nine Line’s Home Collection features items to help customers outfit their homes as patriotically as they outfit their bodies.  “Their Star-Spangled sofas, blankets, and throw rugs allow customers to show pride in their flag by making it centerpiece in a living room they can fill with their flatulence, footprints, and Cheeto dust,” says Divan Alfombra, an expert at the Home Design Institute. ‘Team Room’ themed items come in Multicam with webbing and hook-and-pile tape.