Pentagon leaders exchange lobbyists for Christmas
“Ooh, is that a Raytheon? I’ve always wanted a Raytheon!”
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Page 174 of 175
Pentagon authorizes war on Christmas campaign medal
The medal features a red badge resembling a Christmas ornament underneath festive red, yellow, and green vertical ribbon bands.
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Claiming massive touchdown fraud, Navy vows to fight game results to Supreme Court
"They needed to stop counting the points, but they didn’t."
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'Folksy, down-to-earth' commander actually an idiot
“This man once called the Anbar Awakening ‘a durned poontash of potash."
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Pentagon to replace all-volunteer force with all-voluntold force
"We believe the all-voluntold force will help us acquire the best talent the country has to offer, whether they like it or not.”
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Company first sergeant needs six volunteers for martial law detail
"I’m gonna have to randomly pick a handful of your dumb asses to help suspend the Constitution."
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Air Force deploys precision-guided Covid-19 vaccine delivery system
The GBU-99 Joint Direct Vaccination Munition (JDVM) Mark I uses GPS programming.
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AFN commercial from 2000 just as irrelevant as the day it first aired
AFN has been lauded as “the best single source of media content for those stranded with literally no alternatives.”
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Hypoxic pilot refuses to wear a mask
“There’s a lot of stupid rules we have to follow in the military. But you can die from hypoxia.”
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Air Force celebrates 50th straight year of skipping leg day
MAXWELL AIR FORCE BASE, Ala. – After considerable research, the Air Force History and Heritage Center confirmed the Air Force has reached an impressive feat—50 straight years of skipping leg
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New Navy football uniforms honor tradition of ignoring Marine Corps
“Next year, it could be a ship’s bilge,” he added. “Bilges are very important parts of the ship.”
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New 'call of duty: Field grade' game worth 90 credit hours at Army Staff College
“We actually scanned a crack team of field grades to into the game."
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12th day of Christmas looks like 4th day of Christmas, underway sailor reports
“They say every day is Monday on the ship."
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Army priest leaves military for influential chaplaining job on Capitol Hill
"I think you can see the conflict of interest in having God favoring Raytheon over Boeing or Lockheed Martin.”
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Troops deployed to US southern border wondering if they can go home now
“We’ve been here waiting on that migrant caravan since the congressional election in 2018,” said Capt. Pat Thompson.
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Archaeologists uncover corpse of Roman staff officer at Pompeii desk
“They kept cranking out papyrus scrolls while the world literally burned."
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Veteran thankful to blame PTSD for all his shortcomings
“Blaming the occasional misdemeanor or minor felony on PTSD is fairly standard,” said Dr. Bill Davidson.
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The Duffel Blog story (aka why we're a newsletter now)
The primary and perhaps unsurprising reason? 2020.
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Delayed military mail-in ballots clinch the election for Lincoln
“The legal votes of every brave soldier must be counted,” said Kayleigh McEnany.
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Wow! This soldier’s 23andMe results show he’s mostly burn-pit ash
"This says I’m 68 percent charred camel flesh and surplus military equipment!"
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Point/Counterpoint: Afghanistan is on the road to progress (2012) vs Trump is reckless to pull out of Afghanistan (2020)
By Marine Gen. John Allen and retired Marine Gen. John Allen
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.50-cal-equipped Roomba becomes sentient and sweeps room
“We’re just really glad it didn’t become a Roomba Terminator,” said Pfc. John Connor.
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Meet the general who actually read his entire reading list
Spoiler alert: One item was just a PowerPoint slide.
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Offering a ‘return to normalcy,’ Biden pledges troop surges in Iraq and Afghanistan
“We’re not doing any of this troop withdrawal malarkey."
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Esper fired for not being coup enough, sources say
“The president could just respect the decision of the Electoral College, but he thinks he’s too coup for schoo.”
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