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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 123 · Wednesday, 14 October 2026

Veterans

Vetbro apparel company pivots from stupid shirts to aggressively homoerotic ones

AI deemed ‘too smart’ to replace infantry

Hegseth opens up new TradWife MOS

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Vol. 15 · No. 123

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Vol. 15 · No. 123 · Deployed worldwide

Wednesday

14 October 2026

0453 Zulu

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Coast Guard · Page 7

People stranded on island wave away Coast Guard helicopter, “no thanks! It’s much better here!”

Can you blame them?

Filed · 0500

KEY WEST - The U.S. Coast Guard attempted to rescue three people on Wednesday from an uninhabited island in the Caribbean where they had been stranded for over a month, but were waved away with a message written in rocks and sticks “NO THANKS,” authorities said.

The stranded people — two men and a woman identified as normal Americans — were spotted waving away a rescue helicopter and yelling “That’s rather kind but it’s much better here!” the Coast Guard said in a statement.

Lt. Bobby Thomas, pilot of the aircraft, first spotted the trio after noticing a debris field never a rocky side of the island. “I went into search and rescue mode once I saw that and reported it to the Command Center.” However, what happened next threw off the experienced lieutenant.

“They just didn’t want to be rescued, despite being isolated from the comforts of the modern world,” he said on Wednesday. “As we got closer, two individuals came out and politely declined our efforts, and pointed out their…uhh…anti-S.O.S. message.”

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