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This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.

Story Roundup

Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.

Situation Report

A State Department map that relocated most of Africa, one ambitious government travel card, and 5,200 medical students moved from dorms that definitely do not have mold.

First female Navy SEAL maintains standard of being Oakley wearing D-bag

Piss test first thing Monday

First female Navy SEAL maintains standard of being Oakley wearing D-bag
Will sit on your face or shoot you in it. Whatever, brah.

CORONADO, Calif. — Special Operations PO1 Natalia Bennet made history earlier this year when the former Gunners Mate successfully completed Basic Underwater Demolition/SEAL(BUD/S) and SEAL Qualification Training (SQT), making her the first woman to earn the coveted warfare device known as the “Budweiser”.

Like many candidates, Bennet arrived at BUD/S with a love of Skoal long-cut wintergreen, Oakley sunglasses, and the way she looks shirtless in a plate carrier. However, unlike most candidates, Bennet actually completed SEAL training.

“I was never gonna be a BUD/S dud,” Bennet said while packing a lip. “I may be a lot of things: short, a steroid user, a former Chick-fil-A mascot, and a wall puncher- but I am not a quitter!”

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