Where every war story ends with ‘and then we went TDY.’
Officials say system will remain offline until IT guy 'gets back from leave’
Cadre say film is far more effective than sleep deprivation
“We’re working hard to make the SIPR sites you need the most confusing piles of shit imaginable," an official said.
Donation will “tide everyone over” until someone finds seven billion more cans
Congress assures troops that poverty builds character.
Hundreds of generals trapped at Quantico after DTS crash forced to role-play their way out.
Generals relieved it wasn’t a firing squad or Eyes Wide Shut reenactment
Pentagon insists new base name will really bring the country together this time
U.S. intel community describes situation as “super-weird, even for Alaska”
Cobra had been increasingly preoccupied with Billy’s future, particularly in the aftermath of the group’s disastrous foray into Ukraine.
U.S. military now powered by freedom, capitalism, and high-fructose corn syrup
Family sources confirm she also believes you’re in charge of NORAD.
Jet claims it was just being polite when Qatari royals “kept climbing inside.”
“While he achieved literally none of his stated objectives, the PowerPoint slides were clean, and he cc’d a lot of people.”
The retired officer says that America is woefully under-resourced in a defense technology capability that is only sold by his company.
"There’s no ‘I’ in team" but there are three 'U's in "shut the f--k up"
"“All the DEI nonsense muddied the waters of where Black merit traditionally lies in the military," a spokesman said.
Corners remain to be turned, contracts to be awarded
"Our nation expects only the best from SOF, including their transition to the crazed veteran life."
"We’re all a little confused about how this happened."
“These are not the buttholes that defeated the Nazis."
As recruit H. Potter was called forward, he was heard muttering, “Not Marines, not Marines."
Genius.
“This Airman was like, 'Did you try using Firefox?' And I'm like, brother, I AM Firefox."
"Yeah, I’m a little annoyed that, once again, everyone points to the Jews. Running the New World Order is a team effort."
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