This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.
Story Roundup
Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.
Situation Report
Latest dispatches
The story feed
Page 2 of 177
New ‘every Marine is a pilot’ ethos proves disastrous
2 min read
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Opinion: Come on. You know why I was fired
Former Gen. Chris Donahue explains what happens when competence becomes politically disqualifying
2 min read
Trump announces conditional surrender to Iran
White House says agreement should not be confused with defeat, retreat, or “one of those bad Iran deals”
1 min read
Bolton’s mustache to be sentenced separately following guilty plea
Prosecutors say the facial hair remains “an ongoing national security concern”
2 min read
Pentagon warns US unable to fight two ceasefires simultaneously
Military leaders fear surprise ceasefire in Indo-Pacific could overstretch force
1 min read
members
Hegseth invites 1,776 strippers to Pentagon for America 250 celebration
Secretary says event will honor the nation’s founding while “boosting morale, lethality, and tips”
5 min read
Opinion: Nobody’s going home until the Reflecting Pool is clean
A D.C. National Guard first sergeant rallies the troops to tackle the most critical mission in the nation’s capital.
2 min read
Legally dead retiree still somehow first in pharmacy line
Active-duty officer unable to get ahead of man whose pulse has not exceeded 30 BPM since the Clinton administration.
2 min read
Pentagon insiders increasingly concerned about 'mission creep'
Officials say problem worsens every time Hegseth enters a room
2 min read
Hegseth unveils separate but equal branches of military service
Pentagon insists new force structure is based entirely on merit and several remarkable coincidences
2 min read
Graham Platner insists tattoo of Hitler choking naked woman is being misunderstood
Senate candidate says artwork merely reflects “traditional values”
5 min read
Opinion: Should I water my veteran?
A human resources professional explains the four major veteran hydration categories
3 min read
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Hegseth says half-assed daily PT has solved military's most pressing problems
Defense secretary cites measurable increase in sweating across force
1 min read
Entire platoon killed by missile while conducting accountability formation after previous missile
Leaders reportedly determined standing shoulder-to-shoulder in the open was “the Army way”
2 min read
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Admiral struggles to find day for change of command that ruins most sailors' plans
Navy officials say new planning model can identify the exact day most likely to ruin leave, maintenance, and morale
2 min read
Seven Marines dead after eating nicotine-infused crayons
Camp Lejeune officials say “Crayola Xtreme!” product line linked to riots and overdoses
2 min read
GOP to require all legislators be Navy SEALs
Officials cite growing demand for candidates who have kicked in at least one door
2 min read
members
Opinion: I am not the worst secretary of defense ever
Pete Hegseth says critics fail to appreciate his commitment to lethality, vibes, and unauthorized regime change
3 min read
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Army criticized over Memorial Day recruiting specials
Officials defend enlistment incentives as “a meaningful way to honor the fallen through conversion metrics”
2 min read
Hegseth orders new loyalty oath for Catholic troops
Pentagon says policy intended to clarify “chain of command issues” involving newly elected pope
2 min read
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Homeless veteran turns to prostitution to support WMD addiction
Officials warn illicit weapons of mass destruction flooding American streets are increasingly low-grade
1 min read
VFW puzzled as younger veterans refuse to join organization that hates them
Outreach efforts remain focused on insulting potential members until they qualify emotionally
2 min read
Quentin Tarantino tapped to lead Army chaplain corps
Pentagon officials say director’s “unflinching approach to violence” makes him uniquely qualified for spiritual leadership
2 min read
members
Pentagon adds 'hotness' score to female troops’ performance reports
Officials say new metric will standardize long-standing evaluation criteria
2 min read
Pope announces Trump in custody after stunning Vatican raid
Vatican officials cite “escalating spiritual tensions” after president allegedly began freelancing divine authority
2 min read
