Sitemap - 2021 - Duffel Blog
Elves complain of double standard after Santa 'passes' PT test
Santa denies allegations of toxic eggnog in elf housing
US moves from DIME strategy to NICKEL during economic downturn
VA to offer free cup of coffee while you wait in line to die
Pentagon leaders really struggling with performance review bullets this year
Toddler aimlessly wandering around base may be lost child or new XO
More actors shot into space than Space Force personnel: Report
College student serving in National Guard enjoys worst of both worlds
Meet the boot who cares about the Army-Navy game
Give the gift of laughing at the Pentagon's expense
VFW delays event until fat guy with a beard shows up
Pacific Fleet Claims Garbage Island As US Territory
Navy says lava field near base housing area may be unsafe
Navy intel officer gives wrong secure phone number to creepy crypto guy
Point/Counterpoint: Please stop ratfucking the MREs vs. I want M&Ms
'All Else Fails' added to DoD operational risk management model
DOD’s Afghanistan PCS voucher kicked back due to unauthorized nation-building expenses
A shortlist of things US Navy submarines have never collided with, but might one day
Opinion: Honor America’s veterans by having the naivete to listen to retired generals
Biden criticized for hasty and sloppy withdrawal from War on Christmas
Poll: Troops smoked for minor offenses happy that Air Force got off for killing kids
National Guard deployed to enforce vaccine mandate on National Guard
US strikes deal with Taliban to recover dick drawings left behind in Afghanistan
Trust completely eroded after sergeant pretends to lose count of pushups
Biden wanders into War Room after hearing reports of Chinese lunch
Applebee's to offer free meals only to veterans who won in Afghanistan
Child stays up late on Veterans Day Eve to catch glimpse of veteran climbing down chimney
Army commissions first CrossFit Chaplain
Afghan interpreters relocated to Fort Hood request asylum in Afghanistan
Pentagon deletes Afghanistan photos following ugly breakup
Soylent Green MREs back after popular demand
Taliban seizes $5 billion in abandoned American PowerPoint slides
A Navy SEAL’s Guide to Maximizing your Trick-or-Treating Success
Dick Cheney appears younger following death of Colin Powell
Afghan veteran launches Brown Rifle Chai Company
Hundreds dead after Air Force dining facility runs out of truffles, wagyu beef
First officers graduate SOCOM's new SNACK-O course
Budget-crunched Pentagon introduces 549-cord
Warzone player refuses self-revive kit after doing his own research
Pentagon mulling ban on gender-reveal combat operations
46 nebulous concepts to declare war on now that terrorism is defeated
Navy approves wear of parrots on shoulders
Army to name new 200-ton tank after General Milley
Used Jingle Truck dealers in Kabul preying on Taliban privates
Has to be fate: Lieutenant finds soulmate at bar closest to main gate
Sergeant who refuses to wear mask mandates reflective belts for afternoon PT
Duffel Blog's military transition guide for members who don’t obey lawful orders
Daniel Craig gains 40 pounds, God complex after becoming honorary naval officer
High tech upgrade centralizes all military urinalysis monitoring at NORTHCOM
Biden fires intern in charge of Afghanistan
Taliban victory proves dental readiness a hoax
Progressive soldiers call female commander 'asshole' instead of 'bitch'
CENTCOM commander apologizes for drone strike on wrong carload of kids
‘Way to lose the War on Terror,’ says Coast Guardsman fighting War on Drugs
US contracts Liam Neeson for revenge against Taliban
Taliban fighters launch hit YouTube series unpacking seized U.S. equipment
Veggie omelet MRE came from lab, not wet market: report
Local man struggles to remember name of country he cared deeply about last week
Mike Lindell promises irrefutable proof the US won in Afghanistan
Biden solemnly reflects on where he was when the flying things hit the— uhh, you know, c'mon man
US reassures Afghans that military-industrial complex will come out of this stronger than ever
Taliban S-4 pissed no one has signed for new US equipment
Nielsen says final episode of ‘Afghanistan’ drew biggest ratings in 12 seasons
Draft dodgers vote to make women register for draft
Outrage after US Military leaves 46 dogs, 30 million Afghans, behind
National security think tanks launch surprise assault on Kabul
White House says messaging on Afghan evacuation efforts is going great, man
National Guard commander impressed with how much Taliban accomplished in a single weekend
Taliban can’t believe they actually have to govern this shithole now
US offers to trade back Bowe Bergdahl
Gen. Milley regrets not including Vietnam War history book on reading list
Afghanistan vet who killed indiscriminately praying for innocent Afghans
US intel finds link between Taliban retaking Afghanistan, airmen putting hands in pockets
Afghan interpreters left behind to translate cries for help
Afghan War planners caught plagiarizing ending from war in Vietnam
Army General with 6 minute run time loses war
DoD memo from 1985 finally authorizes service members to wear mullets
Staff Sergeant: This 29th vaccination is where I draw the line
Lieutenant at sleepover dared to turn off lights and chant 'Sergeant Major' in mirror three times
National Guard Changes 'Minutemen' nickname to 'Permanentmen'
77 years after D-Day, 97 year-old veteran finally awarded letter of reprimand
Coast Guard's birthday promises to have boatloads of wine coolers
Hilarious! Sergeant Major’s ‘funny stories’ really just hazing stories
Spelling error leads to mandatory vacations for all US troops
Coast Guardsman enlists to protect and defend Cheddar Bay
99% of you won't share this picture of the US Flag, study finds
PSYOPS to add another S to their name
Taliban calls emergency meeting after US, its largest donor, pulls funding
Space Force still on Air Force’s phone plan
Afghanistan looking forward to peace after US withdrawal, says Taliban Minister of Public Executions
Duffel Blog's definitive guide to making toilet wine
Ransomware takedown of DTS went unnoticed for years
People stranded on island wave away Coast Guard helicopter, “No Thanks! It’s much better here!”
US quietly drops 'Enduring' and 'Freedom' portions of Operation Enduring Freedom
Gen. Milley looks for rebound war as Afghanistan moves on
Last C-17 out of Afghanistan still waiting for CWO4 who said she'd 'be right back'
Segways allowed in new Air Force fitness test
Veteran with 'Be Courteous With Fireworks' yard sign unaffected by Flowmaster exhaust, Toby Keith
Quiet professional wears 'quiet professional' shirt to stress his quiet professionalism
Donald Rumsfeld refuses to live in a world without war in Afghanistan
New MRE has only tobacco, caffeine, and jalapeño-cheese spread
AFN's 'Undercover Boss: Joint Chiefs' show not fooling anyone
Fiery, all-seeing eye atop NSA headquarters vows to protect Americans’ privacy
Commander relieved for tolerating normal human fallibility and error
Retiree just glad to stand around naked in base gym locker room again
Congressman avoids eye contact with Generals panhandling outside his office
Navy denies NFL hopeful's request to delay service due to need for clueless Ensign
Chaos ensues after Gen. Milley inspects Pentagon barracks
Army rolls out ambitious, six-event mental fitness test
Army veteran, poet laureate, reflects on dicks undrawn
Army opens Yes Men Academy for officers
Pentagon authorizes female service members hazard duty pay for pretty much all assignments
Army to authorize beards if vaccine goal reached by July 4th
New VR headsets let soldiers see what life would be like if they joined the Air Force
‘No proof of aliens’ says Space Force General of the Galaxy Mzorpus Klaatu
US hides 5 visas for Afghan interpreters inside Wonka bars
This Memorial Day, Eddie Gallagher reflects on those he totally didn’t murder
North Korea promises to kill as many citizens as necessary to resist US aggression
Absolute psycho brought everything on the packing list
Pentagon says vaccinated troops no longer have to wear masks while throwing up in an Uber
Ted Cruz tells US Army to get back to commercials that make his dick hard
Meet the general officers who broke tradition and just retired to quiet lives
Iran says nuclear weapons program purely for hunting and home defense
Pentagon budgets for enlisted aide position to unmute generals on Zoom
Russian armored division destroyed by soldier’s 20th leg tuck
AWOL numbers skyrocket after Air Force transitions to camouflage that actually works
Officer leaves job in military-industrial complex for the wedding-industrial complex
Space Force bans Moon landings after discovering rare species of lunar tortoise
Lockheed unveils '6th-Generation Fighter for the Middle Class'
Marine Corps forgets Mother’s Day gift for Navy AGAIN and it’s fine, forget it, never mind
Gender reveal mine announces Navy's next ship will be a dud
Bubble-leveling leads to record number of table-slaps at joint commanders conference
Interactive military museum exhibit invites patrons to poop like the troops
Air Force debuts new mission statement: 'Airpower in 30 minutes or it’s free'
1st Sergeant shocked to realize he’s been yelling this whole time
The Army's Long-Range Strike vision is stupid vs So is your mom
DoD adopts new 'Winning Isn't Everything' motto
No one at the bar can tell if Coast Guard guy is stealing valor
Pentagon celebrates its military children with gifts of lifelong therapy and alcoholism
Taliban wonders who will inadvertently fund operations after US leaves
Pentagon to weed out extremists by banning Marine Corps
Ghislaine Maxwell moved to VA Hospital parking lot to await trial
Army says generals can substitute two-minute plank in lieu of victory in Afghanistan
FDA authorizes Crayola vaccine for Marines
Radio Shack manager refuses to give National Guard general time off for drill
Capitol rioters demand military discount on prison sentences
White House under fire over Major Biden promotion to lieutenant colonel
3 eggs found, 18 lieutenants lost at base Easter egg hunt
Soldiers evicted from barracks to protect endangered black mold species
US Navy glad someone else’s boat fucked up for once
Defense Secretary celebrates Passover with slaughter of firstborn budget requests
Inspiring! This infantryman traded Marine camouflage for a Papa John's uniform
Pentagon disappointed with results of ‘It’s Just a Little Prick’ vaccine campaign
Kim Jong-Un seen outside Mar-a-Lago blasting 'In Your Eyes' on boombox
Iranian military holds mandatory extremism standup
Tucker Carlson says he's not thrilled about male military uniforms either
Congressional investigation uncovers what you can do with a drunken sailor
Air Force opens first Montessori Officer Training School
Army mandates quarterly 'don’t invade the Capitol' training
Michigan to host first Space Force Militia
D.C. National Guard deployment extended due to traffic on Beltway, Connecticut Avenue
Army Combat Fitness Test adopted military-wide after rousing success with soldiers
6 surefire ways to determine whether your Chief Petty Officer is actually a vampire
Democrats pander to troops with Dodge Charger loan forgiveness plan
Pentagon says it’s not mad at F-35, just disappointed
New Marine Corps budget calls for more beefy boys with machine guns
How to be a Duffel Blog writer
Handlers step in after dog develops extremist views
Navy considers crotch-level rank insignia in effort to avoid awkward chest gaze
Hollywood studios pass on Dan Crenshaw audition tape
Early-warning system tells E-4s when First Sergeant is approaching
'Rank is just a number,' says E-8 dating E-2
VA hospital burned to ground rated 30% destroyed
Duffel Blog Presents: The 17 best signature block quotes
Chinese-made Trojan horse pretty uncomfortable with several files on Marine’s hard drive
Retired general on Pepsi board vows to win War on Thirst
Army-developed artificial intelligence asks if it’s too late to join the Air Force
Sergeant wants a girl who looks at him like Joint Chiefs look at Afghanistan
Value of jalapeño cheese spread artificially inflated by extended training exercise
Thrift Savings Plan debuts new 'Work Until You Die' fund
Army holds safety stand-down to address dangers of drinking antifreeze
Space National Guardsman regrets having to commute to Moon for drill every month
Kool-Aid Man joins SEALs to assist with forced entries
National Guard halts Capitol and COVID-19 missions after discovering private is red on dental
Former ‘Ranger’ Tom Cotton refuses to call Jill Biden ‘Doctor'
Recruiter nervously watching economy improve
Space Force fitness test to be administered entirely in swivel chairs
Michael Flynn hired to teach un-ethics class at Army War College
Iraq evacuates nonessential workers, fortifies embassy ahead of US presidential inauguration
Most Space Force recruits already speak Klingon, study finds
Critics warn National Guard lacks exit strategy for presidential inauguration
Bewildered senior airman learns he is new acting Secretary of Defense
Duffel Blog Presents: The Top 5 excuses for avoiding a retirement ceremony
Trump adds prominent barracks lawyer to 'legal dream team'
Army's new strategic plan for 2021 outlines the next 10 to 15 minutes
Pentagon insists US military will only interfere in foreign elections