Sitemap - 2023 - Duffel Blog
Does he love you or is he just trying to leave the barracks?
New Year's resolutions for the Services
Study finds 87% of Marine privates could be replaced with Roombas
USMC plan to "kill ships from islands" frustrated by Lance Cpl. plan to "kill sh!t right here."
E4 Mafia tries to submit ‘alternate slate of evaluators’ for promotion board
First Sergeant still an asshole after visit from ghosts on Christmas Eve
Hallmark's military holiday movie to feature love story, crippling alcoholism
Bipartisanship! Congress funds monument to all the allies it’s screwed over
Zelensky to congressional leaders: "May you live forever"
It's a first! Air Force basic trainee becomes grandad
Douglas Macgregor Insists Satan Has “Perfectly Defensible Reasons” in War for Human Souls
Ok, I guess this is it. We're breaking up.
Let's see if we can make you laugh
Turn your access to classified information into a side hustle with these five steps
Vet walks around PX avoiding life; reminiscing about walking around the PX avoiding work
Navy Football’s jerseys exclude SEALs in favor of The Silent Service
US vows evacuation of citizens from Gaza will be as flawless as Afghan evacuation
Nine Line Apparel rolls out home furnishing collection
Army Football Player Has No Idea He'll Eventually Be Relieved From Command
38-year-old soldier uses GI Bill to go to Hogwarts
Gen Z Turns Against Osama Bin Laden After Discovering Problematic Tweets
Army authorizes women to grow beards
Commandant to resume duties after ground-fighting Satan, inspecting Heaven's Marines
Tommy Tuberville applies for VA benefits
A non-cringe note for Veterans Day
Automated VA Voicemail Just Long Enough to Tie the Rope, Study Finds
Woman worried if conflict continues, she will have to learn new country names
Tuberville insists on blocking nominations until someone can answer his riddles three
DoD asks Israel, Hamas to move Intifada to Pacific
Judge gives Coast Guard member choice between jail or joining the military
Marine scientists discover water also makes the grass grow
New Call of Duty: VA Edition immerses gamers in struggle to attain 100% disability
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus…While Daddy Was Deployed
Israeli, Palestinian officials commit to ensuring kids grow up hating one another
Zombies who devoured Camp Lejeune personnel may be entitled to compensation
Russia sends observers to Gaza to provide war crime advice
OPINION: On Veterans Day, I thank hostile nations for my retirement pay
VA closing parking lots for 'suicide standdown'
Declutter your home by losing half your stuff while PCSing
Fort Cavazos to reinstate English feudal right of Prima Nocta
Hometown somehow sucks even more than when you first enlisted
DoD introduces Devil's Advocate General Corps
First female Navy SEAL maintains standard of being Oakley wearing D-bag
Marines Improve Cyber Skills with Microchip Eating Contest
Crossfit LLC wins contract to take Air Force officer fitness tests
Satanic Chaplain Scores 666 on Combat Fitness Test
Marine removed from White House after biting Biden's dog
"Nailed it!", says Intel officer who assessed Middle East violence as "possible".
[INSERT MILITARY UNIT] Struggling with [INSERT OUTDATED OR PROBLEMATIC BEHAVIOR]
Trump: Department of Veterans Affairs will be Department of Losers and Suckers
Government shutdown shuts down Government Task Force to End Government Shutdowns
ASK SGT CASANOVA: Deciphering keywords in dating profiles
"Unsustainable" number of Ft. Cavazos soldiers injured tripping over bodies
Milley opens 'Joint Chiefs' cannabis shop outside Fort Myer gate
Marines: Uhh, that F-35 was in SERE School
New CMC pops as 3rd Battalion, 2nd Marine Regiment’s weekend duty supernumerary
Alien Presents F-35 as Proof of Intelligent Life To Homeworld Government
Department of Defense to reinstitute “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”
Missing F-35 found dead after breakup with pilot
September Surprise: 22 Veterans per Day Clearly Aware of Suicide
Rear Admiral who F*cked Around Retires Without Finding Out
DoD unaware Chief Warrant Officers Guild has been on strike since 1987
Kim Jong Un Returns to Russia on Fanciful Dirigible
SEAL’s tell-all haiku wins ship’s poetry slam
OEF Sergeant Major still worries about the tidy grass he left behind
George Santos’ new autobiography, To Hell and Back, beautiful meditation on combat
Schrödinger's Specialist baffles philosophers and platoon sergeants alike
Intel private who got classified tattoo now living in SCIF
Lethality! Chaplain Corps Unveils Smite Ray
Trump dashes across North Korean border in bid for asylum
Cuba intel mission struggling after death of Jimmy Buffett
West Point time capsule reveals Jefferson Davis voted "Most Likely To Split Nation In Two"
Putin selects Mike Flynn as next Wagner Group chief
Yevgeny Prigozhin pronounced dead after tragic fall from 30,000-foot window
E4 Mafia opens 'E3 Joint Center of Excellence'
Clitoris Porta-John artwork goes largely unrecognized
Netflix Announces All-Female Remake of US Navy
North Korea Requests Starvation Best Practices from Fort Cavazos
Fort Cavazos soldier discovers body while dumpster diving for food
PTSD Barbie excluded from new Barbie Movie
Niger's vets show Jan. 6th vets how it’s done at Coup D'état 2023
“Aggressive” Jon Stewart harassing veterans about PACT Act benefits.
Lance Cpl. extends 248th Birthday Ball TikTok invite to Rep. Lauren Boebert
Tuberville 'Visibly Erect' at Delaying Historic Nomination Of First Female CNO
General’s “artificial intelligence” remarks disturb Lt. Cmdr. Data
Millions of US military emails accidentally sent to .MILF addresses
Tuberville blocks Red Six's posthumous promotion to Red Leader
General Zod escapes Phantom Zone; claims USMC Commandancy
Tuberville demands DoD stop defending Alabama until state reduces infant mortality
N. Korea agrees to swap Travis King for 6 pack of Coors and a Walkman
Veteran hospitalized after attempting to simultaneously stand for flag, kneel for cross
Nation wishes Hollywood strike happened whenever The Hurt Locker was made
Bergdahl last seen wandering toward Navy recruiting office
Acting Commandant upset he doesn’t rate Commandant office furniture
BREAKING: PV2 King "Don't Defect to North Korea" training NOT current
Allies criticize US for sending clusterf-cks to Ukraine
General Berger joins fellow retirees in bashing FD 2030
Steven Seagal falls from window while filming ‘Under Siege 3: The Kremlin Falls’
Meet ‘Bushy,’ first military K9 trained to find internet porn
Retirement Ceremony could have been retirement e-mail
White House urinalysis NCO waiting his whole life for this opportunity
Recruiters celebrate Supreme Court striking down college loan cancellation
BREAKING: Humble F-35 pilot hasn’t told anyone what he flies for over 2 hours
Army creates new ‘Future Douchebag Politician’ MOS
Russia news swings back to boring Ukraine invasion & war crimes
CIA Concerned about TikTok’s "Leak Classified US Intelligence" Challenge
Kim Jong Un vows to kill suicidal North Koreans
Transition success! This retiring Colonel started a career flipping bases
First E4 Senator holds up nominations until DoD allows hands in pockets
Leading barracks lawyers agree Trump should go AWOL
Green Beans Coffee stokes tensions in South China Sea
Airman morally opposed to drag show spends weekend at strip club
Pentagon cancels car wash fundraiser after debt ceiling standoff averted
Poll finds Memorial Day more fun when no one mentions 'dead soldiers'
Navy Seal under fire for lewd OnlyFins account
Students forced to be woke! DeSantis sues Florida's 6th Ranger Training Battalion
Are veterans bad for the economy? Experts say yes
Oh no! The LT thinks he’s mentoring you
Marine Corps to be Redesignated America's 411 Force
Navy Pilot First to Complete Distance Education Top Gun
Five-time suicide drone pilot gets another 72 virgins
Public Affairs Officers join Hollywood writers
Marine Corps rolls out Portapotty 2030
"Yeah if only," say US drone operators after Kremlin attack accusations
Russia’s Victory Day Parade One Vet, Mean Donkey
DOD reunites Jeff and Tina to open a can of whoop ass on leakers
S3 admits he wishes you were all dead
Fighter Pilot’s Ego in Critical Condition
USAF pilots no longer authorized to wear flightsuits during sex
Ranger School Commandant recognized on Earth Day for commitment to recycling
Invoking military heroism, Congressman Santos pleads not guilty
F*ckin’ boot didn’t even leak any of the good shit about aliens
Fleshlight solar chargers will help DOD meet climate change goals
Coast Guard drops trailer for ‘Cocaine Whale’
BIGPENIS: Navy erects virtually unhackable communications network
CIA reveals secret North Korean sky dick drawing program
SAR Team recovers copilots lost on par 5
Biden deserts presidency to fight in Ukraine
MEDCOM classifies hemorrhoids as sensitive items
Chinese spy balloon made mostly out of classified US documents
NORAD Santa tracking systems to eventually track real things
10 Grunt Style T-shirts that scream 'I can't move on'
Nerd Intel Officer won’t store top secret documents outside SCIF
USMC 'Training and Education 2030' calls for 70% Marine literacy within decade
Space Force Special Forces Team sidelined by mass carpal tunnel incident
VetBro wishes he could get back to ranting about issues he understands
White paper about white papers printed on white paper
Major dies while on hold with SATO Travel
Commissary limits retirees to two war stories per visit
Command Sergeant Major suggests Ukraine tell Russia to stay off its grass
Recruiting woes leads Army to revamp 80's slogan
Afghanistan donates 50 MRAPs and Bagram Air Field to Ukraine
Coast Guard Petty Officer insists you call him Coast Guardian
Washington Post asks veterans to just kill themselves already
Pilot’s career summed up as ‘Yeah, she’s pretty hot’
Donald Trump forced to move to barracks following NJP
Army casts Jonathan Majors in new murder mystery set at Fort Hood
Coast Guard member insists you call him Coast Guardian
Air Force drops ‘Join Today, Get Laid Tomorrow’ recruiting slogan
U.S. Army W.T.F! Moments changes name to "Sadly, No Longer Surprising Army Moments"
Fossil of TriCareatops Discovered Outside Fort Bragg
You either die a hero or live long enough to become a government civilian
Ukrainian airman found working side hustle at Kherson Green Beans
Air Force biolab criticized for toxic work environment
Stripper gives up officers for Lent
Survey finds 90% of women join military for pockets
"I’d do it all again if I had to,” says retiring Air Force public affairs officer
Taliban investigates allegations of fair treatment of women
‘Butt hurt’ now covered by VA disability
With possible new charges, Baldwin offered Army or jail
Air Force dining facility receives Michelin Star
Military funeral attendees unsure whether soldier was special ops or dumbass
Local family tired of dad's daily Ukraine war briefings
Russian Army officer touts 'open window' policy to new recruits
VA authorizes veterans to stop growing beards
Walter Reed praises insider threat training as 98% effective
Air Force issues NFT challenge coins
Army: Dahmer missed several mandatory SHARP trainings
Army approves OnlyFans donations for soldier emergency relief
I conscientiously object to learning Microsoft Teams
DoD: Repeated password prompts solely to make you squirm
Actual douche promoted to major
Coast Guard saves shark from crazy, delusional police chief
Marine Corps to start using computers
Specialist admits secret to fitness is meth
Tom Brady: 'Kuwait is not a deployment'
Airmen on jet skis in Guam 'disgusted' with Tom Brady
Putin warns Russia to stop giving weapons to Ukraine
Kid dressed as Army recruiter misses candy goal by 20%
Tom Brady outraged after Marine says their divorces are comparable
Russian General celebrates 2 weeks of not dying in Ukraine
Army official holds up Pat Donahoe's severed head during speech
Ukraine war revealed as elaborate 'Call of Duty' ad campaign
Applebee’s waitress diagnosed with PTSD after Veterans Day shift
Elon Musk offers $44 billion to buy Space Force
Uh oh, Jennifer Lopez killed again in Ukraine
Pentagon to add pronouns to dog tags
The best treats to leave out for Veteran's Day
Marine SgtMaj wins Caldecott Medal for kids book
DoD says new F-35 to be made entirely of Taylor Swift tickets
US advises Ukraine on how to delay medical care, benefits for veterans
Pardoned White House turkey defects to ISIS
Chelsea Manning accused of leaking grandma's secret Thanksgiving recipes
Pentagon recalls Thanksgiving MREs contaminated with real turkey
Army to replace robots with cheaper, more expendable Marines
Navy relieves ship captain over repeated Wordle losses
Air Force 'Rucking Club' just golfing without cart
Army unit tear-gases soldiers for de-morale event
'Black Powder Musket Coffee Company' found in 250-year-old Revolutionary War records
Space Force finally outgrows ‘terrible twos’
Winning Army touchdown downgraded to field goal after Brigade S-1 review
Space Force camo just glow-in-the-dark stick on stars
Space Force-Coast Guard game draws little attention
Russian Army-Navy game ends in HIMARS strike
Marine Reserve celebrates 75 years of 'Toys for Thots'
Elves failing new Christmas Festive Test at alarming rates
Army unit regrets combo Toys for Tots/ammunition amnesty box
CIA reveals Santa was killed in Cambodian airspace in 1971
Fort Bragg strip club owners donate $1B in weapons to Ukraine
Snowden begins to suspect Russia spies on its citizens
Itching to do more for Ukraine, US invades Iraq
Days stranded at airport still count as leave, CO says
New SMA: All soldiers will now wear green beret
There’s your problem: Rifle aimed wrong way at qualification range
F-35 diagnosed with ejectile dysfunction
2nd Lieutenant for sale to a good home
Waffle House employees to teach Army combatives
Navy selects Nintendo 64 operating system for shipboard computing
Court takes everything from guy with 'Molon Labe' tattoo
Coastie in distress takes long pause before calling Coast Guard for help
VA to make crisis hotline toll-free by 2030
Ukraine aid package includes 100,000 'not a tank' signs
White House staffer changes ‘days without security incident’ sign back to zero
Navy recruiter promises a dozen eggs to each new enlistee
Virtual drug test: Airmen can now pee in cups on video
Navy finds arson best way to mothball Littoral Combat Ship fleet
Multiple F-35s shot down in 3-hour dogfight with Chinese balloon
Air Force's 'loving' warfighting strategy making China anxious
New Coast Guard coloring book of drowned corpses promotes life jacket use
Report: Chinese balloon pilot was attempting to defect to US
China: Spy balloon was one week from retirement
Pentagon authorizes Bureaucratic Combat Inaction Award
Report: All female-crewed Chinese spy balloon performed Super Bowl flyover
Navy sends influencer to Super Bowl instead of fixing your ship
‘Sailors belong at sea,’ says man who hates his family
Air Force to revive Tops in Blue as part of 2023 NDAA
Air Force selects Shake Weight for physical training
Watch this idiot pilot drive away with gas pump still attached
Mishap pilot christens F-35 wreckage, names it ‘Whiskey Dick’
Air Force deploys Giant Military Cats to defeat Chinese balloons
Air Force shoots down military spouse after mistaking it for spy balloon
Shaking HMMWV hits 88 mph, travels through time
Jedi chaplain finds your lack of faith disturbing
Navy spills green diesel over aquifer on St. Patrick's Day
Coast Guard recruitment incentive offers $115 in Bed, Bath & Beyond coupons
Drone videos include unskippable 15-second ads
Marine stops masturbating long enough to return fire
Army unveils new logo that totally doesn’t resemble a butthole
Space Force declares bankruptcy after Silicon Valley Bank collapse
Veteran unsure where to tattoo 'project management professional' on body
DoD to migrate all field grade officers to the cloud
US Navy sub accidentally collides with downed Reaper drone
Fort Hood running out of gates to name after murdered soldiers
Space Force chief releases annual ‘binge-watch’ list
Milley accidentally types ‘hot goth girls’ into Teams chat with Joint Chiefs